new blog..

hey peeps. i have blogging ADD, and because of this, i have switched my blog location to tumblr. i like it better, ok? i'll keep this one up for a bit, but from now on go here:

http://steffaloo.tumblr.com/

chow!

pets.

i want a pet turtle. badly. it's name will be wigwam, and preferably it will be a mini turtle. you can buy turtles online for only $9.95 now. don't believe me? click on the picture of wigwam...
















i'd also like to have a pet zebra. its name will be mojo. it doesn't have to be a mini zebra though. apparently, you also have to have an 'exotic liscence' to own a zebra. and i don't have one of those. hopefully this will be my family with mojo one day:
















anyway, i've wanted these pets for a long time now, and i am really getting restless without them. i hear turtles smell bad though. and for some reason, i get the feeling that zebras need a lot of upkeep. but i don't care. i want them. wigwam and mojo.

best things invented in the world, ever.

so, i was thinking today. and what i was thinking was that there are a lot of really great things that people have come up with in this world. so i decided that i wanted to share some of those great things, along with my enjoyment of them. thus, i give you:

'best things invented in the world ever'






dress pockets. i can pretty much speak for all women in saying that dress pockets are the greatest. totally unexpected and yet completely useful. if its chilly, no big deal... my dress has pockets!! no need to find a cardigan. and don't even worry about it making your cute little dress look frumpy, dress pockets blend right into your outfit. dress pockets are basically the best thing invented ever.











psssssst. i don't really need to explain this one. please refer to previous blog. psssssst is the best thing invented ever.








magnets. sometimes i forget that magnets even exist. but then a day will come along where i'll need to hang that radical picture of so and so up on my cabinet at work and oh, i don't have any tape. but tape is annoying anyway, because when you try to take it off it sticks everywhere, cuz that's what tape does, and then you're just aggitated. oh, don't even worry, i have a magnet. easy, clean, and hangs stuff really great. thanks magnet. plus, you can put magnets in all kinds of useful things. paperclip holder, figurine that i can mold into whatever pose i want, just to name a couple. magnets are the best things invented ever.





make up. thank god to whoever invented make up for girls faces. i'm not too proud to say that if it were not for this delightful invention, my self esteem would be suffering far greater than it is at present. not to mention that basically i get to paint my face every day. fun! make up, you are great. you are a best thing invented ever.







zebras. they don't even really do anything, but they look awesome! they are like a horse, but with sweet black and white zig zag stripes. if i could, i would own a zebra and name it mojo. zebras, i am so glad you are considered one of the best things invented ever in the world.







laser eye surgery. i haven't had it yet, but someday i will. and when i do, it will be amazing and i will say to myself, 'that was one of the greatest things invented ever in the world'! because, now i can see! best ever in the world.





popsicles. i was reminded yesterday, and the day before it and the day before that one even, that when it's so hot outside that it feels like satan is slapping you in the face, there's nothing better than a nice frozen popsicle. not only is it frozen, but it is refreshing. usually made of real frui,t or just plain sugar, i'd like to shake the hand of whoever thought of this one... because come on!! it's like, "oh this sweltering sun is killing me! i need a cold beverage! noo! this isn't cold enough! COLDER!" and boom. popsicle. frozen drink on a stick. easy to hold and even better to eat. hot day? no problem. there's a glorious thing called a popsicle and it is one of the greatest things invented ever in the world.

this concludes the first part of my best things invented ever in the world list. there are numerous other items to be added, and perhaps at a later date they will be. thank you and goodnight.

a little something today...

''love isn't made''
my blue jeans are ripped at the seams
and my hair is all tied up in reams
i have a dollar for all my effed up dreams
and when i sleep the lovely screams

i took all your bull shit and ran
now we live in empty houses when we can
i like my covers heavy so i can turn on the fan
and in the morning we'll burn a brand new plan

love isn't made
it's grown
it's grown on hearts and hung on heels

i'm all alone but i have a little song
and i'm not in love but i've been loving you so long
i'm always at home as long as my heart beats along
and if death could speak it'd say you were strong

love isn't made
it's grown
it's grown on hearts and hung on heels
it's grown on hearts it's grown on hearts

pssssssst!

so. i was hanging out with molly j this weekend. we went and did some sweet sweet clubbing on saturday night (since clubbing in hollywood is our favorite thing ever), and in the process of getting ready the next morning, mind you, we had danced our pants off not but 8 hours earlier and refused to shower, she stops to ask me if i have ever used psssssst.

"have i ever used what?" i asked.

"psssssst," she replied.

"psssssst? that's actually what it is called?? i must know more!"

she then proceeded to pull out an aerosol can of yes, PSSSSSST. first of all, are you kidding me??! and second of all, i'm pretty sure this is the best thing i have ever beheld in my short adult life! first of all, it's called pssssst!! that's all i need to know, really. slap my grandma and call me susan, i'm IN. anyway, naturally, upon this great revelation and enlightenment, i had to try some. my hair, still suffering from the aftermath of the nights events just hours earlier was a hot mess. i'm talking dishelveled and greasy. was i going to shower? no. so, i begin to psssssst my hair, and oh.my.gosh. i'm telling you, whatever is in this magical can of psssssting delight, i don't even care because it brought my hair back to life and i felt as if i'd been made anew. say no more life, i am sold. in. done. lifetime supporter. i'm going to the store TONIGHT and purchasing this thing! my hair never looked better given the fact that i forewent showering.

my life just became 20, if not 30 times, more amazing. i don't think i have to say much to convince you of the truth in this whole matter. just go get a can of PSSSSSST and you'll see... ohhhhh you'll see!

this tornado loves you.

my hair is scattered all over my face and my eyelids hang heavy from my sockets. no one is watching.

but this tornado loves you.

and when i sing you a song and play my strings you'll look up for a moment to see me. but the pictures on the walls fall and smash into things we can't recall. a thought could catch you but my spinning is much faster. so i tore your heart out and watched it disappear.

this tornado loves you.

in a blink of an eye i ran through this room, leaving you and leaving your lovers, all helpless on the floor. broken limbs and broken eyes, skin turned inside out. skin too small so i'll break you out, turn you round and spit you back out. and all the while, i'm whistling.

this tornado loves you.

and in the morning won't you come out from all your hiding? come out to meet me. i'll carve your name into the earth and leave all your scratches by the sea never to be found again. chances are i'll destroy you before you step out the door. loving you loving you, you send me spinning.

and spinning on i know you knew, i know you knew..

you knew this tornado loved you.

my new little lover.

so, not too long ago, as in a couple of weeks ago, i was sitting at work

as i typically do every day, and i had this feeling that i needed a ukulele.  i had never really thought about this before, and frankly i have no clue as to where it came from.  whether it was an effect of sheer boredom, or a revelation from above, i may never know.  but all i can say is, it was the best notion i ever could have had.  so, i immediately went on ebay and bought a ukulele for $30.  A week later it was in my sweet little hands and i have fallen in love.  everything that comes out of this little wondrous instrument is like honey to my soul.  so, here is a little snapshot of me and my new little lover. 

 

i will try to chronicle these intimate moments when i feel necessary.  thanks and i love you all.

as i fall asleep.

well, its a pretty significant night tonight. i'm writing this entire blog from my cell phone. its true. welcome to the new world... well, and welcome to the world where at&t doesn't work worth a shit and so the only way I can connect to the internet is through my magical cellular device. good one at&t. I am washing my hands of you.

so, i'm laying here in my bed in my dark room, nothing but the glow of this little screen lighting a 5 inch radius around my face and my arms are starting to ache from holding this up.. the small price I pay for such awesomeness. I can't sleep. and I just remembered that I should have taken a melatonin pill to get to sleep tonight. its too late now. i'm hoping this melatonin thing is the ticket among many attempted remedies to try to cure my inability to sleep well. from warm milk to reading, nothing has ever seemed to worked. well I don't know why i'm even elaborating on all of that. but it happened.

so, as of late, i've decided that I want to purchase a ukulele. I really think that this little musical delight would bring out some pretty great tunes in me. i've been realizing more and more that I wouldn't be mad if someone wanted to pay me to play music for them for the mere enjoyment of them listening to it and me enjoying playing it. when I play music and sing its like my world turns to color and those colors start to dance around me. life seems a little smaller and I feel as if I can do almost anything. and all I want to do is create. every thing I love: music, pictures, art, words, beauty, you.. all become melded together until all I can see is this uncontrollable ball of disastrous beauty that just keeps getting bigger and bigger the more I keep moving. I didn't even know I could do half of the things I can do.

last night was good. I didn't sleep, but I didn't care because my heart was full of life and I finally learned how to start enjoying who I am, not for the love I can get in return, but simply for the enjoyment of being alive and being loved by the one who made me. finally I was able to stop, if even for just a night, craving the attention and affirmation of all those who I thought could define some part of me. its a beautiful thing to realize that I am a kick ass person and to enjoy that fact. haha. and in turn, in doing so, I was able to enjoy those around me in a way I hadn't been able to in so long. life is mysterious and full of color.

I think i'm getting a little sleepy. maybe i've found a cure. thank you technology. the glow-in-the dark stars on my ceiling are all used up now. the constellations have disappeared and the night is whispering its endless call into the land of dreams and darkness.

I am falling asleep...